her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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