So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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