I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Randomize
