I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
