Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
