So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
