i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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