It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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