OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
of course. lets lasso hookers.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
There's even glitter on my cock...
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