he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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