Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
