So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
