I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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