Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
