Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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