so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
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