the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
