Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
