Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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