just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
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