it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
