Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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