Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize
