Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
