I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
