As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Can vaginas get frostbite?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
