So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Small penises have feelings too.
birth control should be required to get into college
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
