I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
There r osticjed everywhere
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
