Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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