Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I've blown a few things in my day
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
