he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
