I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
3 2 1 whiskey
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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