Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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