***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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