My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
You took a bar mat shot.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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