I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize