can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
