I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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