I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
