ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
