On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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