I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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