6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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