I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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