So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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