belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
