brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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