Just cropdusted the office
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
