is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
she told me i tasted like america
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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