38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
